Summary

• Romancing Astarion in Baldur's Gate 3 is complex and requires deceit and trickery to build a relationship, even involving morally questionable decisions.
• Astarion's romance has a push-pull dynamic, where he can be pleased or displeased by dialogue choices, often involving provoking and lying to other characters.
• Achieving a romantic ending with Astarion may have drawbacks, but it is still one of the game's most dynamic and interesting relationships.

In Baldur's Gate 3, there are a variety of different romance options that enable people to form stronger relationships with the characters in the game. Some of these romance options are so dynamic and deep that they can even come to overshadow the main story in the game to some extent. Indeed, in addition to all the friendships in the game, romance in BG3 is just one of the main aspects that make the title one of the highest-rated RPGs of all time.

One of the Origin character options and principal Baldur's Gate 3 companions, Astarion, is an unpredictable, high-elf rogue who appears in the first act and starts off the relationship by tricking the player-controlled character and holding them at knife point. While indicative of his entire being, this can eventually form into one of the most tender and romantic relationships in all of BG3. As might be expected, however, romancing Astarion definitely comes with its pros and cons.

[Warning: The following contains spoilers for main story elements in Baldur's Gate 3.]

Baldur's Gate 3 Romance With Astarion Is Complicated

While many companions are complex creatures with likes, dislikes, and desires, romancing the pale elf Astarion is much more complex than arguably any other romance option in Baldur's Gate 3. Although winning his affection doesn't require the kind of evil that BG3 easily can, Astarion operates on the fringes of morality, sometimes delving into complete and utterly corrupt behavior. While it's arguable whether it's more a matter of utility or cruelty at first, acts of deceit will get the player-made character into the companion's good graces.

This might seem like fun, but it can be tragic in some parts of the game, like one scene in the Emerald Grove involving a young tiefling named Arabella. Astarion prefers to let this small tiefling child get bitten by a snake, resulting in her death. For those who would never make this sort of decision through their playthrough, this could be a much tougher choice than the frequent morally gray ones that elicit a chuckle. However, it's not impossible to romance Astarion by choosing different options; it's just that he prefers options like this, and performing them will improve the odds of entering a romantic relationship.

A relationship with Astarion has a push-pull dynamic, with much more pulling often happening on Astarion's end. This can sometimes result in dialogue choices that confusingly displease him, but as long as selections involve deceit and trickery, there's a good chance he'll approve. Provoking characters and lying are the main paths to Astarion's heart, and he's also not opposed to a little murder here or there as long as it benefits the party.

Those looking to romance multiple Origin characters in BG3 past Act 1 may run into issues. Many characters will provide ultimatums to go monogamous sometime in the second act, and Astarion is no different. While there may be the opportunity to romance other NPCs outside of the main cast, including a few companions met along the way, a decision ultimately has to be made whether to stick with the elf rogue when it comes to Origin romances.

Accepting Astarion's Bite Forms The Initial Bond

At the start of the relationship, the easiest way to get a major boost of approval from Astarion is allowing him to bite the protagonist in camp. Skipping out on this opportunity is possible, but a larger helping of ill deeds will be necessary to make up for the lost affection. While it won't turn them into a vampire, it will give them a debuff on ability throws until the next long rest while giving Astarion the Bite skill. Indeed, if a solid relationship is built on balance, a romantic relationship with Astarion is not one.

Later in the game, one huge decision lies with whether to let Astarion ascend into a full vampire lord by killing his vampire master, Cazador. While doing so will provide Astarion with much stronger abilities, like turning into mist and an enhanced bite, it also makes him egotistical, diluted, and pretty scary. This is all in line with vampires' original attributes in Dungeons & Dragons, but it could easily ruin the relationship. Allowing Astarion to later bite Tav to transform them into a spawn will make him look at the character more as a plaything than as an actual partner.

That being said, it's not impossible to achieve a romantic ending with Astarion down the ascended path. It does, however, strip away the more genuinely romantic aspects of Astarion's personality, and it makes the overall situation significantly more unhealthy than before. This choice severely exacerbates the issue of a clear power dynamic that one party won't actually be able to escape, stripping away all choice in the romantic relationship.

The Good BG3 Astarion Romance Ending Is Bittersweet

It's more than possible to achieve what some would consider a good ending with Astarion, but, like the rest of the relationship with Astarion, it comes with its own baggage regardless of the choices made. Letting Astarion kill Cazador but not ascend, then bite the player-controlled character to become a vampire spawn afterward, won't completely ruin the relationship but will make Astarion treat the character like a pet rather than a partner. This still results in Astarion and Tav being together forever, but it isn't the healthiest relationship, to say the least.

Arguably, the best ending that includes a long-lasting relationship with Astarion is a scenario where Tav allows Astarion to kill Cazador but does not ascend while refusing the vampire's bite. This creates some semblance of balance in the power structure of the relationship but also ends on a somewhat sour note. Upon defeating the Netherbrain, Astarion will attempt to go outside in the sunlight, as he had the entire time the Illithid tadpole was in his brain. Unfortunately, he will start burning, having been tricked into thinking he'd retain these powers.

While it does end with the idea that Tav and Astarion will go on adventures for eternity, including seeking out a solution to Astarion's sunburn issue, it is a rather sour note, considering that more morally correct decisions were made to reach this point. In a sick twist of fate, even the happiest of endings come with caveats when romancing Astarion.

Astarion's Romance Is Fulfilling And Tender

For some, taking the evil or morally ambiguous route through Baldur's Gate 3 is part of the fun, and romancing Astarion will certainly result in a very engaging playthrough. Astarion's companion questline is one of the best the game has to offer, and the tender bond that he forms with the player-controlled character brings out a softer side to him over time. His backstory and the eventual confrontation of it comprise some of the most stirring narrative content in the game, and Neil Newbon's compelling performance gives it a lot of emotional impact.

While it's arguable whether Astarion even likes Tav in the first chapter of the game, as the game wears on and the characters go through more trials and tribulations, it's obvious that he forms real feelings. Later, he'll even go on to express this through dialogue. Though there's only one real "good" romance ending with Astarion that doesn't spill into an overbearing and possessive dynamic, it is a pretty tender and realistic one if the right options are selected.

Anyone trying to keep Astarion on the straight and narrow should focus on building a positive relationship with him and pushing him to do the right thing when it comes to the Cazador confrontation, which is the crucial turning point for hist story.

Baldur's Gate 3's existing levels of character complexity and choice could make it tougher to make morally ambiguous choices without sacrificing the relationship with Astarion, but it's also one of the reasons a romance with Astarion is so great. Unlike a binary good and bad dynamic, peeling back some of the softer layers of Astarion throughout the later portions of the game enhances the feelings of romance, and Astarion's romance path has some of the most dynamic and in-depth cutscenes in the game.

Like other romances in the game, there are actually quite a few variances all the way up to the final scenes of the romance, so each romance with Astarion will be slightly different depending on the choices made. Though the ending is somewhat bittersweet, it is nice to know that the adventures shared in Baldur's Gate 3 will likely shape the foundation for an epic adventure and continued romance beyond the game's last act.