Summary

• Snatch has a mix of crime dialogue and funny one-liners, making it a cult success with memorable quotes.
• Guy Ritchie's film showcases an ensemble cast with quotable dialogue, securing his career in writing and directing.
• The movie features various characters from the criminal underworld of London, resulting in a gritty and hilarious romp, and almost the entire cast has at least one unforgettable Snatch quote.

The best Snatch quotes provide the perfect mix of crime dialogue and funny one-liners that has made the British movie a lasting cult success. The Guy Ritchie movie interweaves various stories about nefarious characters operating in London's criminal underworld. There are the struggling boxing promoters, multiple ruthless gangsters, several inept ones, a deadly Russian, and one very hungry dog. All these stories crash into one another, making for a gritty and hilarious romp with some memorable one-liners.

One of Guy Ritchie's best movies, Snatch wonderfully plays on characters and includes roles for some of his most frequent collaborators, like Jason Statham and Vinnie Jones, as well as some Hollywood A-listers like Brad Pitt and Benicio Del Toro. Each of the characters gets their moment to shine, and the quotable dialogue throughout Snatch makes them all stand out even more. From intimidating speeches to funny insults to dry British wit, the best Snatch quotes both secured Guy Ritchie's career as a writer-director and ensured the movie is still regularly viewed decades after its release in 2000.

20 "He Tells People He Was Named After A Gun But I Know He Was Really Named After A Famous 19th-Century Ballet Dancer."

Turkish (Jason Statham)

Memorable Snatch quotes start from the moment the movie begins, with even the opening voiceover containing some classic Guy Ritchie humor and slickness that's near-impossible to forget. As Turkish (Jason Statham) introduces the audience to the story and Snatch's main characters with his opening narration in the movie, he explains the origins of his name. He then moves on to his partner, and explains that Tommy's name isn't derived from quite as classically tough a source as he pretends that it is.

This introductory line became one of the most memorable quotes in Snatch both because it prepares the audience for what to expect from Tommy.

Tommy (Stephen Graham) being inexperienced and softer than he acts is a running theme throughout the movie. This introductory line became one of the most memorable quotes in Snatch both because it prepares the audience for what to expect from Tommy incredibly well, while also establishing the overall sense of humor of the British gangster movie.

19 "As Bent As The Soviet Sickle And As Hard As The Hammer That Crosses It."

Turkish (Jason Statham)

The characters in Snatch, like many of Guy Ritchie's gangster movies, play into a lot of crime film stereotypes. While this can be problematic at points, having Jason Staham introduce them all through voiceovers in Snatch also leads to some of the best quotes in the movie. Boris The Blade is a major driving force behind the events in the Snatch story, as he's one of the main characters attempting to play various interested parties off of one another in order to acquire the coveted stolen diamond.

As Boris is introduced by Turkish's narration, he gives the audience this colorful description which sums up the hardened Russian very well all things considered. It's as fitting as it is hilarious, as Boris proves himself to be one of the toughest characters in an ensemble filled with tough characters.

18 "It's A F****** Anti-Aircraft Gun, Vincent."

Sol (Lennie James)

The ensemble cast of characters in Snatch are all memorable in their own way. While Jason Statham's narration is the source of some of the most memorable lines, the interactions between the other characters also lead to many of the funniest Snatch quotes. In the first of several failed plans by the mini gang of Sol (Lennie James), Vinny (Robbie Gee), and Tyrone (Ade), the crew attempts to rob a bookie and bring the required ordinance with them.

Vinny shows off what he's got for the job, a large tactical shotgun, prompting Sol to respond with this humorously incredulous Snatch quote. It's far more firepower than they need and, in the end, it makes little difference to the plan's success as it ends up in the hands of one of the bookie's employees anyway. Like many of the best quotes in the movie, Lennie James' delivery really sells this particular quote from Snatch, as his over-pronunciation of Vincent's name is reminiscent of a parent disciplining a child and, as such, absolutely priceless.

17 "It's An Unlicensed Boxing Match. It's Not A Tickling Competition."

Turkish (Jason Statham)

Jason Statham isn't only responsible for many of the best Snatch quotes when he's narrating events for the audience in a voice-over, as Turkish also has an incredibly unique way with words when speaking to other characters in the movie — especially Tommy. Though they are partners in crime, Turkish wastes no opportunity to point out Tommy's naivety and ignorance.

Turkish and Tommy have a unique relationship, with Tommy consistently being exasperated by Turkish's lack of understanding in various situations. He is like an impatient parent trying to teach his young son something. Given how frequently he has to do this, Tommy doesn't always have patience when it comes to explaining things to Turkish either. When Tommy questions whether the bare-knuckle boxers are really allowed to headbutt each other, Turkish offers this hilarious confirmation that tells Tommy just how out of his depth he is. It also sets the stage for plenty of violence to come.

16 "Bonjour!"

Bullet-Tooth Tony (Vinnie Jones)

Vinnie Jones is a frequent collaborator of Guy Ritchie's, and the director knows how to use the unique actor to his full potential — especially in Snatch, as it's impossible to imagine the character of Bullet Tooth Tony played by anyone else. Returning from the cast of Guy Ritchie's first movie Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, former footballer turned actor Vinnie Jones plays the formidable Bullet Tooth Tony. Tony is a hardened enforcer in the criminal underworld of London who has a reputation similar to Boris' for being unkillable.

It is an unexpected moment that shows the off-kilter humor of the movie.

Tony is introduced in the movie as he's seen bashing an unknown person's head in a car door, mirroring a similar moment from the finale of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. When he hears the phone ringing in his car, he stops his violent assault and answers the phone with a friendly, "Bonjour!" It is an unexpected moment that shows the off-kilter humor of the movie that makes it so much fun.

15 "Oh, In Case We Have To Deafen Them To Death?"

Vinny (Robbie Gee)

There is always something entertaining about stupid criminals in movies, and Snatch has plenty of them. Vinny and Sol may not be the most prominent characters, though they are among the funniest. They have some similarities to the relationship between Tommy and Turkish — although Vinny and Sol have qualities of each, with both being somewhat naive and both thinking they know better than the other.

Vinny points out the obvious stupidity in the plan, as the sound of the "bang" won't matter if there aren't any actual shots fired.

As a part of another of the movie's several botched robberies, Sol acquires some replica guns so that they can look like they actually plan to kill someone without having to carry real firearms. Vinny is unimpressed, but Sol justifies his purchase by saying that he bought extra loud blanks. Vinny points out the obvious stupidity in the plan, as the sound of the "bang" won't matter if there aren't any actual shots fired.

14 "Now... F*** Off."

Bullet Tooth Tony (Vinnie Jones)

This line on its own doesn't seem all that memorable, but it comes at the end of a long (and incredibly, incredibly expletive filled speech) that is one of the best in Snatch, delivered perfectly by the inimitable Vinnie Jones, and the final three words for terrific punctuation:

Now, d***s have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell p***y and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old p***y, and have brought your two little mincey f****t balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no p***y here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your guns, and the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O" written on the side of mine should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... f**k off!

Armed with the replica gun, Sol, Vinny, and Tyrone enter a bar with the intention of robbing Bullet Tooth Tony as they catch him unaware. However, with three guns aimed at his face, Tony sits down at a table with his beer and proceeds to intimidate the would-be thugs.

Tony doesn't even see these petty crooks as worth killing.

Tony calls out the three men for gradually losing their nerve with each ing second and the fear in their eyes proves that Tony is correct in this assessment. He then ends the meeting by pointing out that their guns read "Replica" whereas his reads "Desert Eagle .50." Instead of killing the men where they stand, Tony simply ends his threatening speech by telling them to "F*** off" which they promptly do. It is a funny moment showing Tony's weariness after the long day and the fact that Tony doesn't even see these petty crooks as worth killing.

13 "What's Happening With Them Sausages, Charlie?"

Turkish (Jason Statham)

Just like Vinnie Jones, Jason Statham is a frequent collaborator with Guy Ritchie, and the director is just as equally adept at casting him in perfect roles for his unique delivery. Statham returned to Guy Ritchie's world recently after a long absence as part of the cast of Operation Fortune and Wrath of Man, but their working relationship goes back years. Ritchie helped discover Statham in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and returns in Snatch as Turkish, adding a blue-collar charm.

One such part is that of Charlie, someone who apparently works for Turkish (Statham). As Turkish goes about his business, Charlie is off to the side making sausages. However, every time Turkish asks about the progress on the food, Charlie replies "Two minutes, Turkish." It's a pointless aside but adds strange humor to the scene.

12 "Why Do They Call Him The Bullet-Dodger?"

Cousin Avi (Dennis Farina)

Cousin Avi is an interesting character in Snatch because, as an American criminal simply visiting London to rectify a botched situation, he's somewhat unaware of many of the unique customs and slang- of the British criminal underworld. One such example that leads to a hilarious moment in Snatch is London criminals' propensity for nicknames for one-another. Even in a world filled with dangerous characters, Boris's reputation makes him very feared. When Tony and Avi (Dennis Farina) find out that Boris is the one who has the diamond, Tony is worried and reveals Boris has an ominous nickname, "Boris the Bullet-Dodger".

When Avi asks why he's called that, Tony simply replies "Because he dodges bullets, Avi." There are a lot of characters in Snatch with memorable nicknames, from Doug the Head to Brick Top to Bullet Tooth Tony himself. It makes the moment even funnier when Avi finally questions one of these nicknames and is given the most obvious explanation.

11 "Shut Up And Sit Down, You Big, Bald F***."

Cousin Avi (Dennis Farina)

The late-great Dennis Farina has an exceptional talent for playing hilariously blunt tough guys, and this talent led to one of the best quotes in Snatch. He was frightening and funny all at once, and there was nothing funnier than when he started laying into someone. As Avi, a stressed-out American crime lord, Farina steals many of the scenes.

It makes it seem as though Avi appeared out of thin air to deliver this insult.

After learning that his coveted diamond was stolen, he tells his British associate that he's coming to sort out this mess. As soon as Avi is in London, he greets Doug with this aggressive line. The moment is made funnier by the quickly edited sequences of Avi leaving America and flying to London. It makes it seem as though Avi appeared out of thin air to deliver this insult. The line is especially funny since it's delivered to Doug who, in his own right, is a feared criminal in London. It shows just how little Avi cares about the reputation of his UK associates in their native land, and that he views activities outside the US as somehow beneath him.