Teddy is a handyman and Bob's Burgers' most loyal customer. While Teddy openly professes that Bob is his best friend, the grumpy restaurateur is less enthusiastic about owning the title, no matter how many catchy songs Linda makes up about their friendship.
Bob is focused on his work, and he doesn't seem to be interested in having any steady friends other than his wife and kids. Still, his lack of enthusiasm does little to discourage Teddy's efforts to work his way into the Belcher family. Let's take a look at 5 reasons why Bob and Teddy are not real friends, and 5 reasons why they are "best friends to the very end".
Why They're Not: They Don't Have Much In Common
Teddy is a lonely divorcee who is always at the restaurant because he has nothing better to do, while Bob is a married man always juggling a hectic life with his three kids and his burger business. Teddy is a talkative extrovert, while Bob is perfectly happy to be left alone. The main thing that Bob and Teddy have in common is that they both spend a lot of time at the restaurant, otherwise, they really don't have many shared interests or life experiences.
Why They Are: They're Both Similar Type Of "Weird"
There's no denying that Bob and Teddy are both pretty weird, and sometimes that particular brand of "weird" just happens to mesh. In the episode "The Millie-churian Candidate", Bob and Teddy are so obsessed with their favorite brands of tools, that they have a contest over which one is better.
Their competitive streaks get out of hand when Teddy's McLecklin hammer literally destroys Bob's prized Fukinawa knife. Instead of being upset, Bob decides he needs to get a McLecklin hammer too.
Why They're Not: Teddy Doesn't Take Bob's "No" For An Answer
Whether it's pressuring the Belchers to go to his Halloween party, or making Bob wear an embarrassing sumo costume, Teddy has a problem with taking no for an answer. He constantly pushes Bob into doing things that he doesn't want to do and overstays his welcome at the restaurant. Even when he makes customers uncomfortable, Teddy ignores Bob's hints that he should leave. Teddy isn't malicious, he's lonely, but that doesn't mean that he shouldn't respect Bob.
Why They Are: Teddy Is Always There When Bob Needs Him
He may be annoying, but Teddy is a loyal friend who is always willing to help out his buddy. He never runs out of energy when it comes to the Belchers. He babysits the kids on short notice so that Bob and Linda can go to a burger retreat, he stays home with Bob on Halloween and gives him pain medication, and he even offers to take orders when Bob is swamped with customers. Teddy is ittedly pretty terrible at helping, but that doesn't stop him from trying.
Why They're Not: Bob Only Spends Time With Teddy Out Of Guilt
Most of the time that Bob spends time with Teddy outside of the restaurant is either out of necessity, or out of guilt. It's not exactly the best basis for a friendship.
In "Thanks-Hoarding", Teddy is frantic when he realizes that his family is unexpectedly coming to his place for Thanksgiving. Both Teddy and Linda convince Bob to begrudgingly leave his own preparations to help Teddy clean his house and teach him how to cook an entire Thanksgiving dinner.
Why They Are: Bob Cares About Teddy's Well-Being
Bob gets frustrated with Teddy, but that doesn't mean that he wants anything bad to happen to him. When Teddy is determined to win his ex-wife back, Bob is the voice of reason and encourages him to move on because she used to treat him badly. In "Friends With Burger-fits", he becomes Teddy's workout buddy when he finds out that Teddy eats too many of his burgers and is in danger of having a heart attack.
Why They're Not: Teddy Has A Creepy Crush On Linda
Teddy is weirdly open about his crush on Linda, and enjoys spending time with her from sitting at the restaurant to learning to dance. In "Beefsquatch", he even goes on a dazed rant about seeing Linda's breasts on television. "You imagine something for so long, and then what you thought was pink is brown, and what you thought was symmetrical is not. It's just unsettling." It's not always entirely clear if he wants to be friends with Bob, or just "be" Bob.
Why They Are: Teddy Treats Bob's Kids Like His Own
Teddy gets wrangled in to the Belcher kids' shenanigans all the time. He covers for Tina when she sneaks out to the beach to hang out with some older boys, and when the kids leave their bikes in his garage, he its that he likes it and uses the bikes to pretend that he has three kids of his own.
In "The Last Gingerbread House On The Left", he goes caroling with Linda and the kids, and tells them that they can call him "Caroling Dad". Teddy just desperately wants to be a part of the family.
Why They're Not: Bob Makes Fun Of Teddy
Bob doesn't go out of his way to be cruel, but he also doesn't hide his annoyance and general confusion when it comes to the socially awkward handyman. He calls him out on his strange behaviors and will openly make fun of him at the restaurant. In "Synchronized Swimming", he says that he doesn't take Teddy's advice seriously because Teddy will eat anything. He hands him a bit of sponge, which Teddy promptly pops into his mouth. "Don't feed a guy a sponge, Bobby!"
Why They Are: Bob Listens To Teddy's Problems (Even Though He's Bored)
Bob and Teddy have their differences, but Bob might know him better than anyone else in the world. Teddy is famous for his long, boring tangents that even Linda and the kids have a hard time sitting through. Bob doesn't kick him out or tell him to leave him alone. He lets Teddy sit at the counter and chat as long as he wants. He listens - albeit disinterested and busy - and makes an effort to talk, joke, and give advice when he has the time.