It's common knowledge that Clue was no exception. Despite the movie's cool twist of having three different endings — moviegoing audiences didn't know which one they would get — Clue was a box office bomb.
However, it would go on to become a cult classic, and this is largely thanks to its zany characters. Clue has witty dialogue in spades, from Miss Scarlet's double entendres to Mrs. White's famous "flames on the side of my face" line, and the physical comedy is so on point that viewers almost feel out of breath watching the suspects race around the mansion. But who is the best character of all?
The Singing Telegram Girl
The sixth and final victim, the Singing Telegram Girl shows up at the mansion to do exactly what her name suggests. Unfortunately, by the time she arrives, the killing spree is well underway, and she is shot to death with the revolver before she can complete her song.
The Go-Go's co-founder and rhythm guitarist Jane Wiedlin's short time on the screen is one of the movie's most memorable moments. She sings her one and only line with such pep and vigor that it is a hilarious contrast to her unceremonious death — a total representation of Clue's black humor that fans love.
The Cop
Though it is later revealed that the Cop was on Miss Scarlet's payroll, he initially appears to be an innocuous presence when he arrives at the mansion after spotting the Motorist's abandoned car. With the guests panicked about the Cop discovering the trio of corpses in the mansion, Miss Scarlet concocts a harebrained scheme to stage a frisky party. Shockingly, the Cop buys it, though this doesn't save him and he is killed via the lead pipe shortly after.
For an unnamed police officer, the late Bill Henderson sure injects a lot of fun into the role. What makes the Cop so hilarious is his utter nonchalance at having stumbled into what appears to be a sex party. Many people in 2021 would be surprised at what the Cop witnesses, let alone in the '50s when Clue takes place. But as the Cop says, "These people are just having a good time!"
Yvette
Yvette poses as Mr. Boddy's sultry French maid, but in reality, she is a sex worker employed by Miss Scarlet. But Yvette's connections to the guests don't end there, as both Colonel Mustard and Mrs. White's husband were her clients. Yvette has much more skin in the game than the other victims, as she commits a couple of the murders in Ending A. But this isn't enough to save her, as she's strangled to death with the rope during the power outage.
Though much of the humor surrounding Yvette's character is that she's attractive and the men like to leer at her, Colleen Camp saves her from being entirely one-dimensional. Her savvy glances tell the audience that Yvette knows more than she's letting on, and the character proves her intelligence when she frees Colonel Mustard and Miss Scarlet from the lounge by shooting the door open. Yvette even gets some great moments of physical comedy, like when she and Mr. Green try to go up the attic stairs at the same time and get stuck.
Professor Plum
Professor Plum is a former psychiatrist who lost his medical license when he had an affair with a patient — the Singing Telegram Girl. At the mansion, Professor Plum's big moment comes when he "mistakenly" declares Mr. Boddy dead after the lights go out. Ending C finds Plum having attempted to kill Boddy the first time and later succeeding with the candlestick.
Though he plays the hapless professor well, this Christopher Lloyd role certainly isn't as strong as his work in Back to the Future. Professor Plum isn't involved in any of the film's iconic moments and his creepiness — openly staring at Yvette's breasts and forcibly touching Miss Scarlet and Mrs. White — hasn't aged well.
Colonel Mustard
Of all the guests, Colonel Mustard has some of the biggest secrets. He regularly had transactional sex with Yvette — then considered a big scandal — and as a military man, stole helicopter parts and sold them on the black market. While at the dinner party, it's revealed that the Motorist was Colonel Mustard's driving during the war. Mustard bludgeons the Motorist to death with the wrench in Ending C.
Martin Mull delivers the laughs as Colonel Mustard, providing a humorous contrast between the character's blustering machismo and his actual ineptitude. Mustard may have found success as a war profiteer, but in the Clue mansion, he's definitely more of a ive character than one who drives the action. Still, his claim that he "can't take any more scares!" before the chandelier crashes down feet away from him is comedy gold.
Mrs. Peacock
Ever the politician's wife, Mrs. Peacock arrives at the mansion with big hostess energy. But when it's revealed that she has been taking bribes on behalf of her senator husband, she lets her cynical colors show — though not enough to stop her from screaming. Ending B is where Mrs. Peacock shines the most, as she somehow manages to commit all the murders. In Ending C, only the Cook is added to her kill count.
What's so great about Mrs. Peacock is what a sheer hypocrite she is. Eileen Brennan's withering glares of disapproval at her fellow guests' indiscretion are laugh-out-loud funny, which is even further amplified with Ending B. Miss Scarlet runs a business in the sex industry? Shocking! But murdering six people? Had to be done. Plus, sporting both a fascinator and bejeweled cat's eye glasses? Mrs. Peacock wins the fashion game, hands down.
Mr. Green
An employee of the State Department, Mr. Green's big secret is that he is gay — grounds for his firing in the '50s. Most of the film finds Mr. Green nervously proclaiming his innocence with regards to the murders. In all three of Clue's endings, he's telling the truth, but Ending C is where he really gets to shine as it's revealed that he is actually an undercover FBI agent. But Mr. Green still gets some blood on his hands, as he kills Wadsworth, aka the real Mr. Boddy.
The gay jokes sure don't land today as they did in 1985. However, Michael McKean has such spot-on comic timing that the audience can't help but laugh whenever he is on screen. Mr. Green's neuroses and increased panic are matched only by his slapstick comedy, flailing this way and that like when Wadsworth throws him into the bathroom. There's something wholesome about the fact that Mr. Green didn't commit any of the murders. He told you he didn't do it!
Miss Scarlet
Ever the mover and shaker in the Clue plot, Miss Scarlet runs "a specialized hotel and a telephone service which provide gentlemen with the company of a young lady for a short while" — but her real business is secrets. Ending A sees Miss Scarlet at her most dastardly, as she killed most of the victims while ordering Yvette to do the rest. But she still gets her hands dirty in Ending C, in which she kills the Cop.
Lesley Ann Warren brings the perfect dry humor to Miss Scarlet, as the character always has a risque, witty retort for any situation, even those most dire. She doesn't put up with any guff from the men — "Get your mitts off me." — and she is one of the smartest guests. It's Miss Scarlet who devises the whole sex party ruse and she's also correct in her debate with Wadsworth over remaining revolver bullets.
Mrs. White
Her alias may be Mrs. White, but the woman has the most colorful backstory of all the guests. She has had five husbands, one of which had an affair with Yvette, and two of which wound up dead under mysterious circumstances. In Ending C, Mrs. White gets her revenge on Yvette, as she's the one to murder the maid with the rope.
Clue is a phenomenal murder mystery film packed to the brim with comic talent, but the late Madeline Kahn is a scene-stealer. She plays Mrs. White as an OTT femme fatale, complete with mid-Atlantic accent and dramatic veil. Her allusions to emasculating her husbands never fail to elicit chuckles from the audience, but it's her outbursts that are the most spectacular. From smashing her glass against the hearth and throwing it into the fire to sticking her tongue out at Wadsworth to the iconic improvised "flames on the side of my face" speech, Mrs. White is a gem of a character.
Wadsworth
The man of the hour, the butler and master of ceremonies, Wadsworth is the glue that holds the movie together. In Endings A and B, Wadsworth really was a butler, looking to avenge his late wife after Mr. Boddy's blackmailing led to her taking her life. However, in Ending C, it is revealed that Wadsworth is actually Mr. Boddy, and the guests did his dirty work by getting rid of his network of informants.
Though he may be best known as Dr. Frank-N-Furter in Rocky Horror Picture Show, Wadsworth is one of the crowning roles of Tim Curry's career. The "I'm going to tell you how it was all done" monologue is a comedic triumph, especially considering that it's delivered while Wadsworth runs through the mansion at top speed, throws Mr. Green through the air, and hurls himself to the ground. Wadsworth may be one of the smartest butlers of all time — minus his math skills — and certainly the funniest.
