Law & Order: SVU's Olivia Benson (Mariska Hargitay) and Elliot Stabler (Christopher Meloni) continue to be the procedural's most wished-for pairing, but some scenes suggest they should never consider romance. Benson and Stabler are work partners during the first 12 seasons of Law & Order: SVU. Stabler was married and raising five children at the time — one of Law & Order: SVU's best episodes revolves around his desperation to save his daughter from herself when her untreated bipolar disorder lands her behind bars.

Stabler's status as a husband and father didn't make him and Benson any less of a popular couple, nor did his 10-year absence make a difference in how badly the fanbase wants these two together. Furthermore, the backdoor pilot to Law & Order: Organized Crime is a Law & Order: SVU in which Stabler's wife is killed in a car bombing. Kathy's (Isabel Gillies) death cleared the path for Stabler to eventually reunite with Benson, though the Law & Order franchise seemed to drop their romance altogether after they almost kissed in Law & Order: SVU season 24.

10 Stabler Leaves Without Saying Goodbye

SVU Season 12, Episode 24: "Smoked"

Stabler's final episode of Law & Order: SVU is one of the series' most intense. In the final minutes, a girl who is angry that her mother's rape case isn't being handled quickly enough grabs a gun and begins shooting, putting everyone in the squad room in danger. Stabler is forced to shoot to kill, so it is understandable that he decides to leave the unit afterward. However, it was unconscionable that he turned his papers in without telling Benson that he was leaving.

SVU gave Stabler this after-the-fact explanation for his departure when Christopher Meloni decided not to renew his contract after season 12.

When Stabler returned in 2021, Benson struggled to forgive him for ghosting her. It's unsurprising that she was this upset — in the years since Stabler left, she went through several traumatic events, including a kidnapping at the hands of a violent perp who liked to torture his victims, yet Stabler never once reached out to see how she was doing. At best, Stabler took Benson for granted during the years he was missing. However, Benson deserves a partner who she can trust to be there for her no matter what is going on in their own lives.

9 Stabler Doesn't Respect Benson's Boundaries When She Doesn't Want Protection

SVU Season 1, Episode 8: "Stalked"

"Stalked" was the first of several creepy Law & Order: SVU episodes in which perps threatened Benson. In this particular case, Stabler is more worried than Benson when a local realtor she is investigating for the rape and murder of an assistant district attorney begins stalking her. Benson doesn't want Stabler's protection, but he shows up at her house anyway, claiming to "just be in the neighborhood" even though he lives in Queens rather than Manhattan.

Stabler's need to always be the protector makes him a less-than-desirable partner for a strong, independent woman like Benson.

Benson takes this in stride, joking: "That's a lot of neighborhood, my friend." However, Stabler's impromptu visit to check on her is a violation of her boundaries. Stabler's need to always be the protector makes him a less than desirable partner for a strong, independent woman like Benson, especially if he is going to ignore her wishes to check on her safety. He deserved more anger than he got for that choice, even if he only had Benson's best interests in mind when he decided to show up at her home.

8 Benson Encourages Stabler To Work Things Out With Kathy During A Rough Patch

SVU Season 6, Episode 8: "Doubt"

The Stablers go through a rough patch during season 6. Kathy feels that her husband is working too many hours and sometimes is jealous of Benson, who sees him more than she does. Ironically, Stabler and Benson fight more during this period than any other. Stabler tended to take the side of jilted lovers and those who were in the middle of messy divorces after he and Kathy separated, and that led him to snipe at Benson when she disagreed with his assessment.

That in and of itself is a red flag when it comes to this couple. However, the more important aspect of this arc is that Benson is fully on the side of Stabler and his wife working through their problems. Benson even tells Stabler that he is going to lose "the best thing that ever happened to him" if he doesn't straighten out his marriage. This exchange demonstrates how Benson saw the deep love Kathy and Elliot Stabler had for each other and that it was Kathy/Stabler who were supposed to be the unbreakable couple.

7 Stabler Almost Sleeps With A Female Suspect While Undercover In Organized Crime

Organized Crime Season 2, Episode 4: "For A Few Leke More"

Stabler would have been unable to have a relationship with Benson soon after his return. He continually gets involved in undercover work, which takes him away for weeks at a time. Additionally, he crosses the line several times with women he is investigating. During season 1, Stabler gets close to Angela Wheatley (Tamara Taylor), playing a dangerous game because of her husband Richard's (Dylan McDermott) narcissism. He then follows this up by seducing the wife of an Albanian mob boss in Law & Order: Organized Crime season 2.

It's questionable whether Stabler was actually interested in these women, as opposed to seducing them to get information that he needed to put their seemingly untouchable husbands behind bars. However, it's equally questionable how committed he is to Benson if he so easily does these things. No one is forcing him to use sex to get what he wants, and he seems to bear no guilt for his choices during these cases.

6 Stabler Doesn't Care When Benson Gives Away His Necklace

SVU Season 25, Episode 13: "Duty to Hope"

One of the most exciting moments in Benson and Stabler's relationship timeline in Law & Order: SVU takes place at the end of season 24. Before departing on another undercover assignment, Stabler gives Benson a necklace with a com in it so that she can always find her North Star when she feels lost or confused. Although this moment felt like the beginning of a romance, there was no follow-up.

Ultimately, Benson lends the necklace to a victim's mother in need and Stabler has no emotional reaction to her giving away his gift. Instead, he says that Benson's decision to lend Eileen Flynn (Leslie Fray) the necklace demonstrates that she has a big heart. This exchange is the only conversation Benson and Stabler have in Law & Order: SVU season 25, and it leaves open the question of how much they could possibly mean to each other if they rarely speak and Stabler doesn't care what she did with his gifts.

5 Benson Helps Deliver Stabler's Son

SVU Season 9, Episode 9: "Paternity"

Benson is indirectly responsible for Stabler and his wife getting back together. They are separated during Kathy's pregnancy, and Stabler wonders whether the baby is his. Benson discourages him from pursuing this line of inquiry. Additionally, on the day baby Eli os born, Benson is taking Kathy to a pre-natal appointment when they are hit by another car and Kathy goes into labor, forcing Benson to help deliver the baby while they wait for help to arrive.

When Stabler sets eyes upon his son, he and Kathy forgive each other for everything that has kept them apart.

Of course, Benson was only demonstrating that she is a decent human being by helping Kathy. There wasn't much choice in the matter; they were stranded, and Benson couldn't let Kathy and the baby die. Still, when Stabler sets eyes upon his son, he and Kathy forgive each other for everything that has kept them apart. This proves that it was Kathy and not Benson who was the love of Stabler's life.

4 Stabler Covering For Kathleen's Crimes

SVU Season 6, Episode 21: "Blood"

As Kathleen Stabler (Allison Siko) grew older, she began having behavior problems. Stabler covers for her on several occasions. One of the most egregious occurs in "Blood." Kathleen is arrested for DUI, but Stabler uses his connections with the police force to make the charge go away. Kathleen is later forced to pay for this crime when Stabler's cover-up falls apart, but that doesn't change the fact that Stabler engaged in unethical behavior that should be a deal-breaker for Benson.

Benson is a straight shooter who doesn't put up with inappropriate behavior from her fellow cops. She puts Chicago PD's Voight (Jason Beghe) in his place during a One Chicago crossover when he tries to do his usual rule-bending in her presence, and Voight's tendency to see rules as interfering with closing cases is one of the reasons she rejected his offer of romance. Thus, Stabler's similar rule-breaking would be a huge red flag for Benson.

3 Stabler Accepting Kathy's Interference In His Relationship With Benson (The Infamous Letter)

Organized Crime Season 2, Episode 3: "The Outlaw Eddie Wagner"

At the end of the backdoor pilot to Law & Order: Organized Crime, Benson tells Stabler she got a letter he had left for her, but he is in too much of a rush to deal with a case to talk about it. This beat led to widespread speculation about what the letter contained. Unfortunately, the truth was disappointing: the letter had been written by Kathy, not Stabler, and it said that Stabler had left because he realized he and Benson stunted each other's growth and should stay away from each other.

Regardless of how Stabler feels about Benson, it's concerning that he went along with his wife's plan to push her out of their lives.

Stabler claimed the only line in the letter that reflected how he really felt was: "In a parallel universe, it will always be you and I." He supposedly slipped this romantic line into the letter without Kathy's knowledge. Regardless of how Stabler feels about Benson, it's concerning that he went along with his wife's plan to push her out of their lives. He made the heartbreaking decision to abandon Benson and offer her an explanation that wasn't true. A person who would hurt Benson like that does not deserve her friendship, never mind anything else.

2 Benson Puts Off Introducing Stabler To Noah

Organized Crime Season 2, Episode 15: "Takeover"

Once Benson accepts Stabler back into her life, he is more eager than she is to develop a relationship and tries several times to make plans with Benson and her son, Noah (Ryan Buggles). However, Benson puts Stabler off and when he pushes, she eventually tells him that it is too soon. She doesn't want Noah to get attached to Stabler this early in the relationship.

Stabler finally meets Noah in Law & Order: SVU season 23, episode 20.

Benson is being a responsible parent by making this decision. However, the fact that she is worried about Noah getting attached to Stabler suggests that she doesn't think this relationship will last. Benson's trepidation is understandable, considering that Stabler ghosted her for a decade. However, if she and Stabler were as meant to be as it seems, she wouldn't hesitate to involve Noah, as she would believe the relationship is going to last forever.

1 Stabler & Benson Don't Kiss

SVU Season 24, Episode 12: "Blood Out"

In a now-infamous moment, Benson and Stabler come close to kissing in Law & Order: SVU season 24, episode 12. Actress Mariska Hargitay later explained Law & Order: SVU — producer Dick Wolf didn't want to go in that direction. However, in the context of the story, the decision to pull away suggests the pair is not as right for each other as many think.

Benson chooses to abort the kiss in Law & Order: SVU because Noah is asleep in the next room. Additionally, she doesn't feel ready to take that step with Stabler. Benson has good instincts that help her close cases. Thus, if Benson's intuition says not to kiss Stabler, it's a strong sign that the pair are not right for each other, even if the non-kiss is disappointing for that part of the audience that is ionate about these two getting together.

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