Planning ahead for the potential worst-case scenario is always a good idea – according to Dwight Schrute, at least. In the "Todd Packer" episode of The Office, he explains his survival plan for some kind of an apocalypse, including the location of his shelter and how he deals with the food that's about to expire. Eventually, he also shares his thoughts on what his coworkers' chances of survival are if this apocalypse would come to .
Being Michael Scott's employees definitely prepared the staff of Dunder Mifflin's Scranton branch for some unpredictable and sometimes even dangerous situations. Still, it's fun to imagine: will their skills and character traits allow them to survive long-term in a post-apocalyptic world full of brain-hungry zombies?
Survivor: Creed Bratton
Deceiving a horde of mindless zombies should be an easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy task for Creed, given he already faked his own death and spent years on the run, hiding from the police. Plus, considering his past crimes and the success of living under the radar for decades avoiding the law, he definitely boasts a set of skills that would be useful in the apocalypse. After all, his resourcefulness and the ability to think on his feet pulled him through some tough situations like being homeless as well as being involved with several cults.
On the other hand, he's a kleptomaniac and not very trustworthy, which, although useful survival traits, wouldn't be so desirable for a life in a community. So, it's easy to picture him surviving like a sneaky lone wolf, even if it means living disguised amongst the undead.
Not A Survivor: Kelly Kapoor
As an extremely talkative person, Kelly doesn't fit well in a world overwhelmed by zombies attracted to noise. Also, she could always easily distract her coworkers from their work, which means having her around would be high-risk for any community of survivors.
Besides, Kelly loves gossiping about celebrities, online shopping, and spending time on social media, but in a non-technological, post-apocalyptic scenario, she wouldn't be able to enjoy these things anymore. That realization would probably cause her to feel constantly bored, which would lead to another dramatic breakup with Ryan after which he would potentially leave her behind, surrounded by a bunch of unfashionable zombies.
Survivor: Jim Halpert
No doubt, Jim would have a good chance of surviving a zombie plague for several reasons. For starters, as a husband and father, he doesn't fight only for himself but also for Pam's and his children's survival. Because of that, he would make every effort to provide his family a safe shelter as well as other essentials.
Furthermore, as fans of the show learned, his hobbies include basketball and cycling, so he shouldn't have problems with the situations that require good physical condition – or intelligence, which he often demonstrates, mostly by pranking Dwight. On top of that, as Michael's co-manager, he showed some ambition and leadership skills that could put him in a leading position in any survivor group.
Not A Survivor: Toby Flenderson
Toby proved himself to be a good runner, which is extremely important and useful in moments when there's no other option than running fast to escape aggressive but clumsy hordes of zombies.
However, assuming that he gets stuck with the rest of the office gang, his survival odds are fairly low because Michael hates him and the other of the staff have never really stood up for him. At the end of the day, he would likely serve as bait and be sacrificed for the benefit of the group.
Survivor: Oscar Martinez
If this ant manages to hide from the zombie threats more efficiently than he hid his affair with Angela's husband, he could survive quite long. In general, Oscar possesses both intellectual and physical skills that could be very useful when the apocalypse strikes.
Along with being considered the smartest guy in the office who thinks critically and makes rational decisions, he also goes to the gym and practices yoga, so slaying zombies and staying zen shouldn't be a problem for him. Besides, he's not really into getting closer with people at work, which means he would likely handle the loss of his zombie-eaten co-workers pretty well.
Not A Survivor: Andy Bernard
Unlike Oscar, Andy often fails to control his emotions due to his anger issues, so one of his biggest risks of dying in the context of the apocalypse is ending up performing a wild temper tantrum in front of the living dead.
That's why his best chance to stay alive is to sail far away from the coast as he did once on his father's boat, but he would probably forget to properly prepare himself for the journey like he did the first time, which would lead to dehydration, sunburns, and worse in a few months.
Survivor: Meredith Palmer
It's like her whole life prepared Meredith for surviving a radical apocalyptic event. She's a thick-skinned single mother of a troubled son, which means she's emotionally well adapted to the sacrifices and struggles that any type of zombie plague could bring.
In addition to that, she already survived some unfortunate incidents, such as rabies, getting hit by a car, being involved with a terrorist, and setting her hair on fire. Most of them, however, were caused by her constant drinking, which leads to the conclusion that her biggest enemy would be alcohol as well as stumbling upon Michael while he's behind the wheel running over zombies.
Not A Survivor: Phyllis Vance
Known as the office grandmother, Phyllis is not someone expected to confront rotting lurkers. Having in mind that she injured herself dancing at Michael's "disco," it's hard to imagine her being able to parkour while zombies are chasing her since she would probably become exhausted after a few minutes of poking a knitting needle into their frontal lobes.
Also, the fact that she has things like diabetes makes her chances of survival even slimmer. Besides, her tendency to blackmail people along with her habit of threatening them with her husband beating them up could earn her some enemies.
Survivor: Dwight Schrute
He's the kind of guy who always sleeps with one eye opened and is ready with a solution for any unpredictable situation. So, it's no surprise that he was already prepared for zombie attacks in a pre-apocalyptic world of the show, whether it happens in the office or on his beet farm – he made sure that both locations are well equipped with melee weapons and food.
Dwight knows several ways to kill a zombie, but "the most satisfying one is to stab it in the brain with a wooden stick." Plus, he owns "the best survival stock shelter in northeastern Pennsylvania" and undoubtedly has the best skill set of all of his co-workers that include: martial arts, farming, hunting, and the ability to use a variety of weapons among other things…
Not A Survivor: Michael Scott
Throughout the show, Michael proved that he lacks basic survival skills such as knowing the difference between edible and non-edible plants or how to read a map since he wasn't able to use GPS coordinates properly.
Sure, he could compensate some of those flaws with his charisma, relying heavily on the skills and protection of his friends, especially if he sticks to Dwight who would gladly give his life for him. But, if this Regional Manager is left on his own, he would only remain alive until he tries to satisfy his hunger with poisonous mushrooms.